Friday, August 12, 2022

TV Quote of the Day (‘Veep,’ As Her Personal Trainer Offers to ‘Normalfy’ a Speech)

Vice President Selina Meyer [played by Julia Louis-Dreyfus] [to speechwriter Mike McLintock]: “I want to talk to you about this speech for the World War I service, okay?”

Mike McLintock [played by Matt Walsh]: “Very proud of it, ma'am. I gave this one 100% effort. [pauses] As I do everything I write for you.”

Selina: “Okay, I'm not sure about this... ‘To honor all who fell in frozen Flanders Fields and hold their memory fresh.’ It's just a little bit too ‘F-fy’ for me, you know?”

Mike: “Well, that's kind of the idea, ma'am. I mean, it's poetic.”

Campaign manager Dan Egan [played by Matt Walsh]: “Yeah, but we're trying to appeal to the blue-collar demographic, right? Not the poets.”

[Having been sliding around in the background, Selina’s personal trainer and lover, Ray Whelans, hired by Dan to “relax” Selina for her Presidential campaign, suddenly moves to the front.]

Ray Whelans [played by Christopher Meloni]: “I agree.” [Ray takes paper, starts reading speech aloud.]  “So... ‘16 million perished.’ No, they didn't. They died, so just say that. ‘The loss, though impossible to adequately comprehend...’ That sentence is impossible to comprehend. Just say, ‘hard to understand,’ you know? Plain English.”

Dan: “I kind of agree.”

Ray [helpfully, to Mike]: “I could ‘normalfy’ this for you.”

Mike [horrified]: “No. No, no.”

Selina [to Mike]: “No, no, no. Just listen. He's got sort of a working-class touch, which is something that's valuable, and we should listen to it….”

Ray: “So, Mike, what's your favorite part of this speech?”

Mike: “Okay. This is like Gettysburg. ‘Beneath the...’ [Annoyed, tries to disentangle some wires tying him to Ray] ‘Beneath the dark soil of Passchendaele, 100,000 bodies still lie unaccounted for. Let today be their funeral service and we their mourners.’"

Ray: “How about this? ‘There's a whole lotta guys who never came home. Good guys. Here's to those guys.’”

White House Chief of Staff Ben Cafferty [played by Kevin Dunn] “Holy f-----g Christ. What is that, Ray?”

Ray: “I'm just spitballin'.”— Veep, Season 3, Episode 7, “Special Relationship,” original air date May 18, 2014, teleplay by Simon Blackwell and Tony Roche, directed by Becky Martin 

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