Host
Arthur Mee (played by
Terry Jones): “Good evening and welcome, whereas Proust would say, 'la
malade imaginaire de recondition et de toute surveillance est bientôt la même
chose'. (roars of applause; quick shot of
grinning faces of the jury) Remember each contestant this evening has a
maximum of fifteen seconds to sum up 'A La Recherche du Temps Perdu' and on the
Proustometer over here...” (curtain pulls
back at back of stage to reveal a true, enormous, but cheap, audience
appreciation gauge; it lists the seven books of Proust's masterwork in the firm
of a thermometer) “you can see exactly how far he gets. So let's crack
straight on with our first contestant tonight. He's last year's semi-finalist
from Luton – Mr. Harry Baggot.” (Baggot,
in evening dress, comes forward from back of stage, with a number three on his
back.) “Hello, Harry. Now there's the summarizing spot—you're on the
summarizing spot, fifteen seconds from now.”
(Music starts,
continuity-type music. The needle of the Proustometer creeps up almost
inperceptibly to a tiny level.)
Harry
(played by Graham Chapman): “Proust's novel ostensibly tells of
the irrevocability of time lost, the forfeiture of innocence through
experience, the reinstallment of extra-temporal values of time regained. Ultimately
the novel is both optimistic and set within the context of a humane religious
experience, re-stating as it does the concept of intemporality. In the first
volume, Swann, the family friend visits...”
(Gong goes,
chord of music, applause. The meter has hardly risen at all.)
Mee:
“Well tried, Harry.”
Voice
Over (provided by John Cleese): “A good attempt there but
unfortunately he chose a general appraisal of the work, before getting on to
the story and as you can see” (close up
of Proustometer) “he only got as far as page one of 'Swann's Way', the
first of the seven volumes. A good try, though, and very nice posture.”—
Monty Python's Flying Circus,
Season 3, Episode 5, “The All-England Summarise Proust Competition,” air date November 16, 1972, teleplay by Chapman,
Cleese, Eric Idle, Jones, Michael Palin, and Terry Gilliam, directed by Ian
MacNaughton
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