TV Quote of the Day (‘The Simpsons,’ As Lisa Sees a World Turned Upside Down)

[To everyone’s astonishment, after attending a football game with the next-door neighbor he once scorned, Homer Simpson has become pals with kind, generous Ned Flanders.]

Lisa Simpson [voice of Yeardley Smith]: “Dad and Flanders friends? What’s next—A’s on Bart’s report card?”— The Simpsons, Season 5, Episode 16, “Homer Loves Flanders,” original air date Mar. 17, 1994, teleplay by David Richardson, directed by Wes Archer

TV Quote of the Day (‘The Simpsons,’ In Which a Dance Teacher Assesses Marge)

Ballet teacher Chazz Busby [voice of Hank Azaria] [to student Marge Simpson]: “I haven’t seen dancing like that since my Broadway show Dancing Like That. Closed in a week. Too smart for the corndog crowd, too dumb for the bagel bunch.” —The Simpsons, Episode 19, Episode 15, “Smoke on the Daughter,” original air date Mar. 30, 2008, teleplay by Billy Kimball, directed by Lance Kramer

TV Quote of the Day (‘The Simpsons,’ As Bart Expounds on ‘The True Meaning of Christmas’)

Bart Simpson (voice of Nancy Cartwright): “Aren't we forgetting the true meaning of Christmas? You know, the birth of Santa.”— The Simpsons, Season 9, Episode 10, “Miracle on Evergreen Terrace,” original air date Dec. 21, 1997, teleplay by Ron Hauge, directed by Bob Anderson

TV Quote of the Day (‘The Simpsons,’ With Homer in Fatherly Style)

“Well, it's 1 a.m. Better go home and spend some quality time with the kids.”—Homer Simpson (voice of Dan Castellaneta) in The Simpsons, Season 8, Episode 10, “The Springfield Files,” original air date Jan. 12, 1997, teleplay by Reid Harrison, directed by Steven Dean Moore

TV Quote of the Day (‘The Simpsons,’ on How to Present a Family to the World)

“Now remember, as far as anyone knows we're a nice, normal family.” — Homer Simpson (voice of Dan Castellaneta), in The Simpsons, Season 1, Episode 4, “There's No Disgrace Like Home,” original air date Jan. 28, 1990, teleplay by Mike Reiss and Al Jean, directed by Kent Butterworth and Gregg Vanzo

TV Quote of the Day (‘The Simpsons,’ With Homer Blissed Out On Cannabis)

Marge Simpson (voice of Julie Kavner): [Homer comes home with a new suit] “Where did you get that suit?”

Homer Simpson (voice of Dan Castellaneta): “Woah, woah, one question at a time.”
[Points to Marge]

Homer: “Yes, you?”

Marge: “Homer, I am getting really worried you are going overboard with this. We are out of clothespins, there are half-eaten cupcakes all around the house, and the curtains smell like doob.”

Homer: “Well I got news for you: I just got promoted and it's all thanks to yes-I-cannabis!”

[Homer walks away]

Homer: “We have a kitchen?”—The Simpsons, Season 13, Episode 16, “Weekend at Burnsie's,” original air date April 7, 2002, teleplay by Jon Vitti, directed by Michael Marcantel

TV Quote of the Day (‘The Simpsons,’ on Bad Work by School Do-Gooders)

“Every time I do art, some do-gooder teacher sends it straight to a therapist.” —Bart Simpson (voice of Nancy Cartwright), in The Simpsons, Season 25, Episode 19, "What to Expect When Bart's Expecting," air date April 27, 2014, teleplay by John Frink, directed by Matthew Nastuk