“My opinion of myself was lower than the ground. What good could come of this new friendship?
“I thought I might be Diana's ‘confidante,’ perhaps
write her a song or two. Lately I’d been pulling pianos out from under covers
anytime I'd find one parked in the wings of the theater, or I'd go back to my
hotel room and work upon a wretched little electric keyboard, my voice hushed
against eavesdroppers, saying things that I had lately let others say for me.
“The first song I wrote was called ‘When Did I Stop
Dreaming?’”— Rock ‘n’ roll Hall of Fame singer-songwriter Elvis Costello,
Unfaithful Music and Disappearing Ink (2015)
Twenty years ago today, Elvis Costello and Diana Krall were married on Elton John’s estate outside London, in a mash-up of
styles and sensibilities: he, a dark knight of Britain’s New Wave, before
moving on to other genres where he continued to vent his wit, rage, and
emotional turmoil; she, Canadian, cool, and composed, bringing her blond sultriness and
glamour to pop standards seldom seen since the heyday of Peggy
Lee.
There was also the couple's contrast in appearance. The year before the wedding, Costello recalled in his memoir, at their
joint presentation of Song of the Year at the Grammys, Krall “was so beautiful.
I looked like an unmade bed.”
At this point, Costello felt worse than he admitted
looking. With a difficult 17-year relationship with Cait O’Riordan ending, he
was as mired in the slough of despond as he had been during his great 1998
collaboration with Burt Bacharach, Painted From Memory (which I
discussed in this blog post from a few weeks ago).
Meeting Krall lightened Costello’s heart when he was,
as the stark title of one of his songs from that period went, “In the Darkest
Place.”
As the mutual admiration of Costello and Krall grew
into friendship, though, she turned to him for comfort as well, as she
experienced within two months the deaths of her mother and one of her mentors,
bassist Ray Brown. Costello observed,
“The imminent intensity of our friendship was bound up in this powerful
sorrow.”
Most people don’t end up marrying the friends who pull
them to shore just as they think they’re drowning inside, let alone joining
them in family and creative unions. (Costello helped his wife write a haunting
lament for her mother, “Departure Bay.”) But in whatever form it takes, the
kindness of those who unexpectedly enter our lives can make a real difference,
a light in a season of darkness.
(The image accompanying this post, showing Elvis
Costello and Diana Krall on the red carpet at the 2009 Juno Awards in
Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada, was taken on Mar. 29, 2009, by Shayne Kaye.)
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