Tuesday, December 22, 2015

Bonus Quote of the Day (Andrew Ferguson, on Xmas Songs From ‘Melisma Mamas’)

“When it comes to Christmas, then, Mariah Carey and the other melisma mamas might be right to leave Jesus out of it altogether and settle instead into Santa's lap for three minutes of forelock tugging. Most singers and songwriters do the same, avoiding piety in favor of a frolic. This is the common course contemporary Christmas music has traveled over the last several decades. The most prominent trend has been toward what the music industry calls the ‘novelty song’—a ditty so insubstantial that it wobbles from funny to infuriating in 32 bars. Excellent examples of novelties in the secular songbook are ‘How Much Is That Doggie in the Window?’ and ‘Disco Duck’ from ye olden times on up to the more recent Rock Me Amadeus’ and ‘Crazy Frog.’ And so my all-Christmas station sputters with ‘The Chipmunk Song,’ ‘Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer,’ ‘Here Comes Santa Claus,’ and ‘I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus.’ If Weird Al Yankovic suddenly converted and took responsibility for writing all our new Christmas songs, he could do no worse than ‘Be Claus I Got High,’ ‘I Want a Boob Job for Christmas,’ or ‘Daddy Please (Don't Get Drunk This Christmas).’”— Andrew Ferguson, “Jingle Hell: The Debasement of Christmas Songs,” The Weekly Standard, Dec. 21, 2015

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