“You manifest with abundance in the heart department.”—Paula Abdul to contestant Chris Rene, on The X Factor, quoted in “Sound Bites,” Entertainment Weekly, December 16, 2011Someday, this quote will make its way into Bartlett’s Familiar Quotations, according a level of immortality to Paula Abdul. In the meantime, you have to wonder if her 15 minutes of fame--extended on American Idol, then, inexplicably, on The X Factor---are about to end, given Simon Cowell’s recent announcement that she’s being let go from the latter show.
According to recent scuttlebutt, Ms. Abdul was none too happy with her change in employment status. At this point, if she’s thinking anything about “the heart department,” it’s as she holds a firearm and aims for that particular portion of Cowell’s anatomy. (Many past contestants on his shows may wonder if that organ of his is, indeed, functioning.)
Should Ms. Abdul ever be indicted for any offense related to the above, there’s a good chance that no jury in the nation would find her guilty of offing the Botox-injected, supercilious, talent-challenged judge-producer--unquestionably, the worst British import since the redcoats in the American Revolution.
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