TV Quote of the Day (‘Curb Your Enthusiasm,’ As Richard Lewis Tries in Vain To Dig Larry David Out of a Hole)

Richard Lewis [played by Richard Lewis]: “Dr. Grambs, this is my friend, Larry David.” [To Larry] “This is my dermatologist. Really? What, for 15 years already?”

Larry David [played by Larry David] [grinning]: “Even with the whole affirmative action thing?”

[Prolonged, awkward silence, then…]

Dr. Grambs [played by Gregg Daniel] [incredulously, glancing quizzically at Richard, then back to Larry]: “I'm sorry. I beg your pardon, what?”

Richard: “Yeah, what do you mean?”

Larry: “It was a joke.”

Dr. Grambs: “What do you mean, ‘The whole affirmative action thing?’”

Larry [protesting more insistently]: “No, no, no.”

Dr. Grambs [to Richard]” “Who is this guy?”

Richard: “It was a joke. He's like a buddy. I know him, he's a sweetheart.”

Dr. Grambs: “The implication being that I wasn't good enough to be a dermatologist?”

Richard: “No, come on, it was a joke. He's a liberal, he's like you and me.”

Dr. Grambs [to Larry]: “So, if I wasn't black, you would have said the same thing, or not?” [To Richard] “Do you see my point?”

Richard: “I see it in a historical sense, but not in a nice-day sense.”

Dr. Grambs: “You know, Richard, I've worked too hard and too long at this. I can't do it. I don't know what his trip is, but I can't do it. “

Larry: “I don't have any trip! No, it was a joke!”

[Dr. Grambs resumes jogging, waving them off.]

Richard [to Larry]: “Holy s--t! What hit you?”

Larry: “It was a joke.”

Richard: “I know it's a joke, but you sounded... Christ, like Pat Buchanan's gym partner.”

Larry: “I was just trying to be affable.”—Curb Your Enthusiasm, Season 1, Episode 9, “Affirmative Action,” original air date Dec. 10, 2000, teleplay by Larry David, directed by Bryan Gordon