TV Quote of the Day (‘The Andy Griffith Show,’ As the Sheriff Plays a Joke on His Deputy)

[Deputy Barney Fife has just been on the phone in the Mayberry jail, using as much charm as he possesses to get a date with Juanita. After hanging up, he tests out a cologne when Sheriff Andy Taylor enters, surprising him. Despite Barney’s frantic efforts, Andy sniffs out the source of the scent, then picks up and reads the bottle label before his squirming deputy.]

Sheriff Andy Taylor [played by Andy Griffith]: “‘Nuits de Paris—or—Paris Nights.’”

Deputy Barney Fife [played by Don Knotts] [sheepishly]: “Well, it's famous stuff. A lot of celebrities use that... radio announcers and everything.”

Andy [continuing to read]: “Capturing the fragrance of Riviera rose-petals and the passion of the Mediterranean moon in a rugged, he-man scent.” [Pausing slightly] “Caution: user should wear gloves.”

Barney [grabs bottle and checks label for that last part, as Andy laughs hysterically]: “You're funny, aren't you, boy? You're really funny. Give you a hundred on the laugh meter!”— The Andy Griffith Show, Season 3, Episode 3, "Andy and the New Mayor,” original air date Oct. 15, 1962, teleplay by Harvey Bullock and R.S. Allen, directed by Bob Sweeney